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Tuesday, December 25, 2012


Having kids, it’s difficult to hate, outright, Xmas Morning.
Aside from that early hour, or so, I find it otherwise quite simple to despise the “Season”.
My Eldest figured out the truth behind the subterfuge of Santa, some time ago.
Last night,(Xmas Eve), he indicated that he would like to be an Elf…and would I please get him up at 4 am.
I assented, and he awoke me(!) at 3:55
We dislodged the presents from their hidey-hole, put out a dummy coffee cup(complete with dregs), and jangled the “jingle bells”(usually on the Big Gate), outside the window where Youngest was sleeping…the Psy-Op/Subconscious Manipulation-Phase of the Annual Mythos of Greed/Coersion.
At 6 am, after tending the fires, I put on the whole Nutcracker…hour and a half…(I cheated, and started with Wagner’s Das Vorspiel…an arguably Pagan tune)…
My hobbling around became increasingly incareful…and when Youngest opened bleary eyes, all I had to say was “Merry Christmas” to send him uncharacteristically leaping from bed, to make sure everyone was awake, and then(to his credit, 2nd) checking under the tree.
A Mystic/Agnostic and a somewhat lapsed Catholic apparently make for good kids…little of the rivalry and “Mine!”  that I remember from my own youth.
One Hour…out of around 3 Months!
Imagine if we were all but Required to have Halloween, or Mother’s Day, or Easter…sound and fury and smells and wall to wall…for 3 months out of a given year.
”Here comes Peter Cottontail…” blaring from every TV, and speaker, public and private, for 90 days.
Pastels and Peeps, omnipresent.
How about a yearly fight, on both the Psychological Front, as well as sometimes the Physical, over the “Reason for the Season”…Bunnies or the Risen Christ!
I forbid “Christmas Music” around here, till  Epiphany.
Same with the Tree, and all the other trappings.
Luckily(snort) we don’t have Cable…so I am excused from the incongruity of Gladiatorial Bloodsport…and the Announcers that go with it(!)….in a Season ostensibly about Peace on Earth, already marred by Acquisition and maniacal and crafty Ad Campaigns.
I have no problem with the whole Bethlehem story… nor the many Pagan symbols and accoutrements that have been, somewhat dishonestly, attached to it…Goose Doctrine, and all…
I do have a problem with the Overkill…and the Happy Happy Happy…and forced Expeditions to Houston in the Dead of Winter…and Cinnamon Smell overpowering one’s nose at every turn…and the Insane Rushing About…and the more secular Xmas songs(I detest “Rocking around the Xmas Tree”!!).
I expect, and hope, that the Little Guy figures it out , in the next years…
I’ll cherish the memories of that Hour, or so…but the rest, I’ll not be sad to see go.
Once my cover is blown(as “Santa”), I’ll more than gladly choose to Hibernate for the 3 months of the “Holidays”.

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